Friday, June 30


I always do it..
It doesn't matter if it's the plot to the next Star Wars movie, or reading ahead on the EPG to see what happens in Eastenders this week, I always like to know what's going to happen in advance of seeing movies or televisions shows.

So it's hardly surprising that I already know more than I really should about the series finalé of Doctor Who.  It all started because I thought I saw/heard a Dalek weapon being discharged in the preview of this week's episode.  Cue me going on the internet to find out all about the "Army of Ghosts" episode. 

Initially things looked promising for a Dalek Army rising up against a Cyberman army in the series finalé, as one internet-fan-boy-forum hypothesised that the spheres featured in the trailer contained Daleks, and they would even feature a new "Spider Dalek" amongst their numbers. 

However now, sadly, it would appear that the only Dalek's that appear are long dead, and are part of the Torchwood alien museum (and it is one of their agents discharging the Dalek weapon).  There are a million theories on how Rose leaves the series too.. Is she killed?  Does she live in the parallel universe?  Is she turned into a Cyber-Rose? 

Who knows? 

All I know is that it's gonna be an exciting ninety minutes of television. 

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Thursday, June 29


So this weekend see's the end of the current series of "24" in a big, double episode season finalé.  Additionally this weekend marks part one of the two part story that will see off the current series of "Doctor Who". 

This sucks. 

Why do good TV shows have to go away? 
More importantly, why do good television shows all air at the same time.  For example at one point earlier in the year a week of television included episodes of "Lost", "Battlestar Galactica", "Doctor Who", "24", etc, etc.. The Sky Plus planner was packed to the rafters and every minute spent in front of the Idiot's Lantern was an entertaining one.  Now the schedules look quite barren and empty in comparison.  Factor into this desolate outlook that the World Cup will finish soon and the viewing outlook resembles a pit of despair.

So.. can anyone recommend a good book for when the baby's sleeping?

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Wednesday, June 28

For the benefit of those that suck..

Did anyone read this in today's metro..?

"An Internet sex shop is looking for people to test a pill that, ahem, 'makes your sexual fluids taste fruity'. is offering £200 for couples to take the pills twice daily and give blow-by-blow [Did you see what they did there? - Ed] account online.  The Sweet Release Oral Sex Enhancement pills come in two flavours - apple for men and lemon for women.  It's maker, US-based Blue Mountain Neutraceutrical, claims it will make 'your semen change from a salty flavour to a delicious apple taste'.  While the 100 per cent [sic] herbal supplement has passed safety tests, LoveHoney said it needs to try out the stock.  'We have just started selling them and we want to make sure they work,' spokeswoman Ali Carnegie said.  They are looking for couples who are up for the job despite the low pay.  'People should really do this for love,' Ms Carnegie added."

Well we asked the man from Del Monté, and he said "yes"!

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Gigs and Tours

Forgot to mention..
Was feeling a bit jittery after the Foo Fighters gig the other day as I no longer had any gig tickets, no concert to look forward to.  This was the first time in years that I had no gig to look forward to and it felt odd.  Thankfully we have now booked (for comedy value) to see Lordi in the Academy this October.  Ticketsheister ( tried to tell us that it was sold out, but thankfully TicketLine ( had tickets ready to buy.  So cry "Hard Rock Hallelujah!". We're off to see the mad Eurovision winners.

Also realised this is the first gig I shall be going to as a married man - a weird thought indeed!!

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My head's battered, but I'm still upright

Blog updates are a bit erratic at this moment, aren't they? 

This is because my ability to write anything coherent for the blog relies on me having had sufficient sleep and this week I am way down on the old slumber quota, I'm afraid.  Kirstyn decided to wake up for a feed (noisily, I might add) at about 2:30 in the morning on Monday night/Tuesday morning and then decided not to go back to sleep.  At all.  Well not until about ten to seven anyway.  Consequently my head has felt like it is full of cotton wool for the last two days.  Quite how I managed to drive on the motorway, when all the other cars had exhaustion-induced vapour trails I'll never know.  But I did.  And I got a bit more sleep last night, so despite still be quite exhausted I now can -just about- operate a keyboard competently.

So for the first time in nineteen days I am faced with the prospect of having no football to look forward to.  Boo.. and, indeed, hiss.  I'd got quite used to watching at least two matches a day, and find it quite an irritation that I will be deprived today.  It's been quite an exciting tournament so far with world-record numbers of yellow and red cards in a single match, diving Dutchmen, cheating Italians and England have yet to be knocked out, so all in all not bad at all.  Could there be any potential upsets in the next couple of games though?  Could the French knock out the Brazilians?  Could ze Germans overpower Argentina?  Could the Italians beat Ukraine fair and square without having to dive for a dodgy penalty?  Time will tell..

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Monday, June 26

JAM - (Just Another Monday)


Oh, sorry about that, how rude of me.
I do apologise.
It's just that as another week begins, I'm still knackered.

I thought I knew what tired felt like, but it would appear that even after thirty-two years there are still some things about the subject of sleep deprivation that I had previously not experienced.  Honestly, I have never felt this tired before.  It is now I am beginning to regret having a job that requires me to (occasionally) access my brain, as thinking hurts right now.  Thinking not so good.  If I had a nice mundane job where a half-awake state was actually enough to be competent in the role, life would be so much easier. 

But anyway, let us not dwell on such things, it is no way to start off the week now, is it?

Groovy things that happened over the weekend:

1) The footy.  Despite an lacklustre performance, England managed to get through.  Hurrah.  Thankfully Portugal took pity on the under performing three lions (hear them roar! Miaow!), and decided to get two of their best players suspended for the match against Sven's men.  Which was nice.

2) I downloaded a playable demo of "Loco Roco" for the PSP that launches right off the memory stick.  Apparently this is how they're going to offer PS One games for the PSP.  It's well slick.  And "Loco Roco" ain't bad either.

3) I found out that Russell Brand (comedy genius) has a television show on MTV on a Sunday night as well as hosting "Big Brother's Big Mouth".  The self-proclaimed "keen amateur gynaecologist" hosts a show called 1 Leicester Square and this has been Sky plussed and is available to watch at anytime (although it's probably best viewed after the kiddy-winkies are in bed).. The Swines!

4) I finally made use of the "Broadband plus" facility from NTL this weekend.  One of the nice freebies (along with free streaming music videos, music, radio stations and Big Brother live) is 15 free pictures printed and posted out to you every month.  Okay they're only 6 x 4.5 prints, but you know, gift horse and mouth and all that.  No prizes for guessing what the prints are of, by the way.

Anyway that's all for now - hopefully there will be a few more postings this week..

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Friday, June 23

This is worthy..

Every now and then I get tipped off about great sites, and I will mention them on the ole blog if I think they are of a certain caliber. This qualifies with bells on. Turn up your speakers, click this link and prepare for a laugh riot

Clicky, Clicky
(Worry not, this is completely work safe)

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Tuesday, June 20

Warning team, life force fading..


Today is the first day back at work and my head is truly up my arse at the moment.  I don't know if I'm coming or going.. It's just going to take a day or two to get back into the routine of getting up at seven and leaping into life, I'm sure, but the concept was alien to me this morning.  I guess I've never had so long off work before, and I've never had to do night feeds at 2 in the morning before either, so it's no wonder that my body clock is a little ruined.

But I've been trying to do some admin, and trying to get back into where I was before this three-week whirlwind occurred but I'm not convinced my brain is up to it today.  Which is to be a bit expected, isn't it?

Did this stop my project manager talking at me for forty minutes this morning, asking me where I was up to? 

Oh no. 
Common sense is not a required skill for project managers, it would seem. 

Obviously he thought I could just walk in after twenty one days away (during which I've probably only got 7 day's worth of sleep) and know exactly where I was up to, what was outstanding, and what I would be going on to next at nine o'clock in the morning.  I'd only just about got my PC to work with the new flat-screen monitor that had miraculously appeared on my desk in my absence about five minutes earlier (due to my old CRT monitor supporting some weird ass resolutions)! 


I'll have to have the same conversation with him again in 24 hours when brain is working at at least 30% of capacity and see if I retain any of the information this time!

Also cannot believe I will not fulfil my quota of three live World Cup matches today.  Pah!  Between that and missing my daughter, being in work really sucks at the minute.  C'est la vie, eh?

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Monday, June 19

Foo-king brilliant

Once again, the Foo Fighters put on a killer gig. Dave Grohl never fails to look like he's having an absolute party on stage and his enthusiasm never fails to inspire a big reaction from the crowd. It was a good set with new tunes ("In your honor" being a surprise opener for me, I thought they'd start with something punchier off the new album like "No Way Back" -but that came later), old tunes ("This Is A Call") and all the favourites inbetween (including "The One" - top tune).

What amazed me most last night though is the number of people there who didn't know anything before "There is nothing left to lose". I thought "Monkey Wrench" was the quintessential Foo's track, but so few people seemed to know it (because it's off "The Color and The Shape", probably), and even fewer seemed to know the "rant" near the end of the track (which is the top audience participation part of the gig, I always thought anyway..). Shame. So for the benefit of any Foo newbies ("noobs"?) who are thinking of heading out to the gig without knowing the following lyrics, this is what you need to learn (and, er, shout loudly):

"One last thing before I quit
I never wanted any more than I could fit
Into my head I still remember every single word
You said and all the shit that somehow came along with it
Still there's one thing that comforts me since I was
Always caged and now I'm free"

It was almost as bad as seeing Slayer at the Download festival with Sean and seemingly only the two of us knowing about the "Fucking Hell" in Chemical Warfare!!

Anyway top, top, top concert!

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Sunday, June 18

Father's Day

No, no not the episode of "Doctor Who" from series One where Rose travels back in time to the moment her father was killed by a hit-and-run driver (although that is a good episode).

No, today is father's day, so I have been lavished with gifts (F.A. Cup final DVD and Chocolate Orange to mention but two) and cards this morning and have had my breakfast made for me. Of course later today, I am doing the traditional father's day thing of dumping the kids on the Grandparents whilst we bugger off to watch the Foo Fighters -yay!

Tis kind of a bittersweet father's day though as this week my parents left these shores to take up permanent residence in Spain. This departure date had been a long time coming, and was further delayed by the arrival of their first grand-daughter, and it was hard to see them go as I feel like there's still so much I need to learn from them, particularly about being a parent. My Dad made being a father look like a doddle, it came so naturally to him - and as a Grandfather he's even more accomplished. And when I look at my Dad, particularly when he's cradling my daughter and he's chatting away to her and she's staring back at him transfixed, I really hope that I can do at least half as good a job as he did. No doubt about it though, he's a tough act to follow!

Anyway, Happy Father's Day, y'all

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Friday, June 16

Hollywood? Cannes? Balls!

North Wales is where the movie magic happens - you fuckin' know it!

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Wednesday, June 14

Things what I have learned this week

Appy-polly-logies (as Alex says in "A Clockwork Orange") for the lack of posts, things have been quite mad around here and sitting down in front of a computer has been way down on my list of priorities, I'm afraid.

However I have learnt somethings this week:

1. I really want Glyn to win Big Brother. Now I know a lot of you are just rolling your eyes and thinking, well surprise, surprise the Gog is backing the contestant from North Wales. However, I really do think he's the most entertaining housemate in there - by accident. Although he doesn't realise it, Glyn is a comedy genius, particularly when he is so proud of the "life skills" he has learnt in the house which include (in no particular order): learning how to do the washing up, learning how to boil an egg and learning on how to make a sandwich. Pure Comic Genius.

2. I have learnt that turf really does need an awful lot of water poured on it daily if it is to survive this mini-heatwave.

3. I have learnt that going anywhere with a two-week old baby takes at least three times as long due to the fact that every woman will stop you, coo, look at the baby and ask the following questions: "How old is she?"; "What did she weigh?" "What's her name?". Every one of these questions will be punctuated with an "Ahhh..". The worst example was in John Lewis yesterday where we were trying to compile our wedding list (although I shall be moving all the electrical items onto our wedding list at Amazon methinks, they're much cheaper). Every bloody shop assistant surrounded us, it was like a scene out of a most-menopausal "Dawn of the Dead".

4. I have learnt that watching three World Cup matches a day with my daughter is very rewarding. Going back to work next week will be a bitch.

More soon..

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Thursday, June 8

Oh for fuck's sake

Now we'll never sell the idle cunt.

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Tuesday, June 6

Still here

How do all.

Apologies for the lack of posts recently (oh no, this is beginning to sound like the "blog of old" isn't it? Where there'd be nowt posted for weeks and then you'd get a brief apology.. and then there'd be nowt posted for weeks and then.. -well, you get the picture).

However, as you can probably imagine, it's a busy time: trying to allow Liz to recover, trying to look after a newborn, and trying to keep a five year old who's on his second week of half term amused. Add to that the fact that the weather has improved dramatically [got your lid down, James? -Ed ] and there hasn't been a lot of time for sitting in front of the PC. Hell I even forgot to update photobucket for about a week.

It's made worse by the fact that I have no fucking clue as to what day it is at any given time. This is the disadvantage of not being at work (not been in for a week now!). So you no longer have a nice routine of week-days and weekends, you just have 24 hours of day followed by another 24 hours of day. I feel almost restricted by the lack of boundaries. It's odd. Thank god for Sky+ when you feel like this too as I have no fucking clue what day it is, then I therefore have no clue as to what's on when. Thankfully Sky+ (still the best gadget I have ever owned) is keeping track of everything for me. Bless it.

Not that there's a lot to watch, to be fair. "Everybody Hates Chris" has finished as has "Curb your Enthusiasm" on More 4, as well as "The Street" and "Life on Mars" on the beeb. Add to the fact that I am beginning to lose all faith in Big Brother this year (someone chuck a grenade in, and lets be done with all of the small-minded twerps, well either that or throw open the doors and let them all walk out), and all of a sudden the schedules are looking a little light. If it wasn't for the weekly visit from the good doctor, and "Top Gear" (playing football in cars - genius!!!), there'd be nowt on to watch.

Anyway, am wittering on.. Will shut up and go now and leave you in peace. Just wanted to let y'all know that I'm still here (and just about awake too!!!).. I will try and organise a "wetting the baby's head" pub visit when I can get my head round who I am, where I am and what day it is!

Take care all, catch you soon..

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Saturday, June 3

Are you excited?

A week to go until the World Cup!
And there's footy on the telly this afternoon (and I can drink again - hurrah!). Now I know Eng-er-land were on Tuesday night, but someone interrupted my viewing. However I have seen endless replays of Peter Crouch's "robotic" goal celebration.. Oh, dear.
So a Saturday afternoon of football beckons, followed by a new episode of Doctor Who.

This is why I pay my licence fee!


Friday, June 2

Me & My Girl

No, not the dodgy 80's sitcom featuring that bloke out of "Man about the house".

Sorry, I don't mean to go on and I cetainly don't want to be one of those "baby bore" type parents. But this is just a little post to say Mum and Kirstyn are home safely now. Thanks to everyone who has sent cards and gifts, and if anyone wants to pop over then you're more than welcome, just give us a ring first so we can be sure we're in.

Normal service in this blog will be restored soon - at the moment just too happy to gripe!

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