Bad Pub Design

Nothing annoys me more in a pub than having to wait an absolute age to get served.. 

After all, it's adding insult to injury, seeing as you're already amazed that it's "your round" again and you're about to receive a swift financial kick in the knackers due to the fact that a bottle of beer that will cost you less than a fiver for four in any good supermarket is going to sting you for the best part of three notes.

Honestly, you want to know where all the highwaymen went to?  They're running the "Dog and Duck" down the high street.  They don't even need to wear a silly mask, carry flintlocks or shout "Stand and Deliver" to rob innocent people anymore.. just sell bottled beer.  The bastards.  So being made to wait for ages to be ripped off on top of all that, is just plain rude.  After all going out for a beer is supposed to be a sociable experience, but when you're stood at the bar waiting to be mugged, you're away from the people you're supposed to be socialising with.  All in all it's just a faff.  I mean, why can't we have table service like you do in mainland Europe (and quite a few bars in London too), that's so much more convenient (and also goes some way to justify the astronomical price of 33cl of fizzy lager).

So anything that actually adds to your waiting time at the bar is not to be welcomed.  Indeed anything that makes it more difficult to get served is definitely to be scoffed at.  So may I present as exhibit A, a first class example of something that makes the whole "going to the bar" experience more painful than it needs to be: Televisions behind the bar. 

Now I'm sure the intention behind them was good, as in "We don't want the punters to miss any action in the televised football whilst they're at the bar".  Fair enough.  But, as religious nutters say: the road to hell is paved with good intentions.  What actually happens is that suddenly being sat at the bar becomes the best seat in the house as you have a clear view of the television, you have somewhere to rest your pint, and when you finish your drink you don't have to move to get served again.  So the entire bar in now lined by selfish, stubborn, inanimate bastards who you have to shout round/over to be heard by the barmaid and contort yourself past in order to pay and get your beer.  And if you accidentally knock them when you're trying to steer the four pints you've ordered past them, they have the cheek to "tut" and glare at you.  The gits.

So, please, no more televisions behind the bar.. By all means make one television visible from the bar area so you can keep an eye on the match whilst you're queuing up to get served, but let's not do anything to encourage these ignorant squatters any further.. In short, let me get robbed quicker please!  Thanks.