Do farts contain DNA..?

..Because, I tell you, the whole "whoever smelt it dealt it" law is fundamentally flawed in my humble opinion.

Just over a month before Christmas now - blimey. Fortunately this year I am now only three presents away from not having to worry about the whole gift-giving experience. Christmas shopping is rather like a game of Trivial Pursuit, desperately trying to collect wedge-like (or pie-like) presents before making a mad scramble for the centre of the board. Except a game of trivial pursuit with more stress, infinitely more players (all of whom will, no doubt try and walk into you and shove in front of you in the "please pay here" queue in WH Smith). Fortunately I will not be making a return to the blasted Trafford Centre with one week to go (like I did last year where I swore, after forty minutes in the car park desperately trying to find a space, that I would be more organised in future) and most of my Xmas objectives have been achieved online..

Just hope that Santa got my letter and there will be a small, but perfectly formed and wrapped TARDIS underneath the Christmas tree come December 25th. Have deliberately not re-watched the first series of Doctor Who on UK Gold in preparation for a mammoth sesh whilst I'm off over the Xmas season. Now if Santa could also leave, by mistake, a PSP that was intended for a rich person that would be lovely..

Ho ho, and indeed, ho..